Love Flows

Today, when I woke, I knew the answer to my blood flow issue would be given.  My stomach was in knots and I was unable to eat prior to my appointment.  I was cautiously optimistic about a change in blood flow, but looking at how things have turned for me in the past, I wasn’t ready to accept the possibility of the results I wanted.

My husband sent me a text wishing good luck and assuring me that regardless of the results we would get through this.  That little text seemed to calm me as I sat on the examination table along side an ultrasound machine.  As soon as the tech began the procedure I heard a noticeable difference in the sounds coming from the machine.  A strong cadence reflected seen visible through blips on the screen.  The tech informed me that my left side (which was originally the side with the worst readings) was completely normal (a score below 3)! I was thrilled, I smiled with relief!  Finally, another appointment where good things were found!  If this side can move from 6.2 to below 3 then I have nothing to fear for the right (originally 3.6).

As she moved to reading the right side I knew things would be fine.  However, as the tech tried to get a reading my relief turned to fear as the strong cadence I heard earlier was a little erratic.  I asked why it had changed and the tech said that sometimes the right side is harder to “find” and that she would do several readings until she got it right.  After about 5 minutes she found the spot and came up with a reading just over 3 – 3.06 to be exact.

What does this mean?  Things are pretty much normal, and with continued acupuncture, baby aspirin, and lack of caffeine things will be perfect come time to transfer!  One hurdle dealt with!

In my journey to motherhood, the dedication and love that I have for the little person I’ve yet to meet, I have overcome one obstacle and plan on doing the same with the others lining my path.

Thanks to the love that flows from me, my husband, and those around us, we are moving in the right direction.

-R

Doppler Ultrasound…My Nemesis

In Greek mythology Nemesis is the goddess who delivers vengeance and retribution to those deserving punishment.  For me, Nemesis has a different name – Infertility, and I’ve yet to understand why I have been handed this punishment.

Yesterday’s appointment was supposed to be one of hope.  At approximately a quarter past 4 the nurse came out and told us that there is yet ANOTHER hurdle we have to overcome. The Doppler ultrasound results came back abnormal.  My uterus is not getting sufficient blood flow.  Without adequate blood, problems with implantation or sustaining a pregnancy can occur.

In that instant, my hope turned to grief.

In an attempt to remedy this newest diagnosis I will have to make a few changes and come up with another $2000 (or more).

Change #1 – ZERO caffeine.  None, nada, zip!  No more coffee, no more black or green tea.

Change #2 – Baby Aspirin.  Every day.  I have an allergy to ibuprofen so need to get this cleared.  I pray we can take it as aspirin can thin the blood slightly and allow for easier blood flow.

Change #3 – Acupuncture.  With a specialist.  Twice a week until the transfer (possibly longer).

We will recheck blood flow at the end of June to see if things have improved.  If they have we will move forward with the IVF cycle.  I’m freaking out because there is no guarantee these things will help and my expenses are increasing while my funds are not.

-R